Writings

She'll Piss Herself

I hope she laughs so hard that she does piss herself. I hope she is free enough to do that, and I can count on you to encourage it. Too many people are afraid to be expressive. To know inside that the whole theory behind potty training is conformity to a perceived norm that is imposed by fear and social taboos. If only all of us could let go of our hang-ups and at last realize that we are an integral, yet small part of a great ecology and that urine is rich in nitrogen. It has value for the minerals that can be absorbed into the soil as well. We would all save time and be more comfortable if we didn't have to keep getting up from our chairs or stopping our cars all the time.

That's disgusting, you say? Consider the mouth, which carries more germs than any other part of our bodies. We humans are quick to expose the gateway to our stomach, the passage of nourishment, to foreign microscopic agents each time we touch lips. Yet we shun another inherently innocent bodily function and pretend it actually is not a pleasurable and intimate experience to be celebrated; it is relegated to being a source of shame that we must keep private and avoid mentioning as one of life's wonderous gifts. If you can kiss without shame, you can piss without blame.

©1996 James Boland

Other Writings
The Great Elf
The Lady From The Supermarket
Neal
The Indignant Bastard Troll
The Unauthorized Biography Of Mike Bellina